I have a two year old. When he was about 6 months old his father (my now-ex) began physically abusing me. It left marks and all but I didn’t want to leave because I didn’t have proof of where the bruises came from and didn’t want to have to split ...
I have a two year old. When he was about 6 months old his father (my now-ex) began physically abusing me. It left marks and all but I didn’t want to leave because I didn’t have proof of where the bruises came from and didn’t want to have to split custody of my son if I left. When my son was 9 months his dad strangled me for the second time and the whole instance was caught on the baby monitor, which automatically sent the footage to my phone. Now that I finally had proof of what I was going through I went to the police, took out a restraining order, and was awarded full custody that day (which I still have). Anyways, when he strangled me, my son was in my arms. I was able to put him on the bed before the strangling got… umm.. bad, so he was safe. Thing is, because he was at rolling age (but couldn’t roll yet) and because I had kept him around a physically abusive relationship, DCF was called by someone at the police and they opened up a case on me and my ex for child neglect and endangerment. They required that I leave the relationship (which I already had, ex was in jail by now) and move out of my amazing apartment that I loved so much. They also needed me to see a counselor and complete a domestic violence training for how to avoid being a victim. I complied with literally everything, no questions asked, and then they told me that the allegations were supported because it was proven that I endangered my son by 1.) staying in the relationship (which I really wanted to leave before I did but I just knew that no one would believe me about the abuse without proof) and 2.) by putting him on the bed when my ex came at me since he could’ve rolled off and gotten hurt. So because the allegations were true, the 51a (DCF report) was found “supported,” and I had to go through the whole thing of having a caseworker drop by a bunch, etc. Anyways, my new house was acceptable and my son was thriving, I was working, he was in high quality childcare, the whole nine yards, and after three months the caseworker was like “you guys are fine, your DCF involvement is over.” I’m finishing my student teaching in four weeks and just read that DESE will search DCF records and having a 51a opened by DCF for child neglect or endangerment can potentially delay or prevent your license. Btw I have had zero involvement with the legal system, no addiction issues, literally nothing in my whole life except having a kid with the wrong person. What steps can I take to be proactive to make sure that my license comes through? Or am I screwed? Please advise because I am very anxious about this. License is for elementary Ed btw. I just feel like if the DESE people knew the whole story about the 51a then they would cut me some slack so how can I be proactive about sharing the whole story? (Everything I just wrote can be corroborated by the police report from the event, the restraining order I filed, and the DCF records themselves btw.) submitted by /u/Narrow-Butterfly-923 [link] [comments]